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Wedding V Marriage

Although a wedding is a significant (and HAPPY, crazy fun!!) day in a couple's life I think it's crucial to remember that after this day has been and gone, the most important and lasting thing (aside from some ah-mazing photos and memories you will cherish) is your actual MARRIAGE. We can easily get caught up in the small stuff, "keeping up with the Jones's", going over our budget, getting into tiffs about what music to play for that first dance when really most of these points are inconsequential when placed alongside the notion of "wedded bliss" with that one person we have chosen to spend our days with.

On that note, here's my two cents worth on the key to a happy marriage (and hopefully a happy wedding):

Agree on what it is you both want - this goes for your wedding day and with most negotiations as a couple - together - be that planning a getaway, a BBQ get together or even in the bedroom. It's all about communicating. All too often you see one half of the couple with a vision of their wedding day from their childhood and a fiance who is all but left out of the preparations when the mother-in-law, wedding party and other stakeholders get involved. Both parties should be into it: communication is key to ensuring neither party end up with a celebration not in keeping with their values and dreams.

Don't sweat the small stuff!! Remember to keep things in perspective. Does it really matter if the bridal bouquet is baby pink or mauve? Is it honestly worth ruining your make up over if it's a little off...? Yes wedding planning can be tedious at times - but it comes with the territory - get involved and have fun! And remember nothing is perfect! If (read: when) something goes wrong on your wedding day instead of falling apart think of the great story it'll make!

Don't overdo it! Is it really necessary to go on a three day bender for your buck's do? Meantime, a dress is a dress - as long as you feel comfortable and beautiful it doesn't matter if it's designer and $15k or a last season bargain off the sale rack!

I have plenty of friends living with wedding remorse when they look at that $60k debt they accidentally racked up.

Remember to love one another - planning a wedding can get stressful. You don't want to look back on this time and recall how you seriously lost your shit at the smallest details of your wedding day - or remember a disinterested fiance who was more concerned with catching up with "the boys" for one last hurrah than helping to arrange his nuptials.... *sigh*...

Remember you're in this together, so appreciate the efforts your loved one is making to help create the day you're both dreaming of, and don't forget why it is you are marrying.

Make it your own - on your wedding day and in life. You're unique and special, just like your relationship. Have your dog as part of the ceremony, skydive before you tie the knot, have an intimate legals-only style wedding followed by a night of cocktails and dancing, elope to Malta... so many options!

This is something you're only planning on doing once so make it memorable and do it your way.

Good luck!

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